Thomas Hardy once wrote that "some folk want their luck buttered." He was ages ahead of his time; his words now describe the Internet entrepreneurs who continue to feast on personal data snatched from Web users -- all in the midst of consumer outcries over Internet privacy and increasing government scrutiny of the gathering of corporate data.

The boundaries of personal space are shrinking for many Americans, and nowhere is this more apparent than on the Internet. With "cookies" on our hard drives and commercial come-ons in our e-mail, Internet users are waking up to a new reality: Companies can freely buy and sell consumer credit-card numbers, home and e-mail addresses, telephone and Social Security numbers and shopping preferences without ever asking permission.

None of this is new, but Internet companies seem more blatant about their appetites. A visit to any Web site today might result in 10 electronic junk-mail missives tomorrow. It is not surprising that a recent Harris poll found that 57% of U.S. Internet users favor laws regulating the ways in which companies collect and use personal information.

Why regulation is necessary now

Internet companies fail to understand that protecting consumer privacy makes better business sense. According to a 1999 Georgetown University survey, 92% of commercial Web sites collect some form of personally identifiable information from consumers. A majority of these sites have "privacy policies" posted, but they are often riddled with legalese and ultimately are meaningless. They rarely, for instance, guarantee that consumer data will not be sold to third parties.

E-commerce companies have made only meager attempts at self-regulation. In recent weeks, Microsoft, America Online, Doubleclick and others trumpeted their forthcoming privacy-enhancing technology called the Platform for Privacy Preferences or P3P. The technology will allow consumers to judge Web sites that conform to their individual privacy demands.

It sounds encouraging but puts the onus on consumers and does not encourage Web firms to change their behavior. According to privacy advocates, P3P's key failing is that it could allow companies to gather even more data on users. Privacy-guarding technologies are no substitute for clear federal guidelines.

New laws will not materialize, however, until Washington stops coddling its new problem child. Congress threatens privacy regulation yet does nothing. Politicians are so painfully aware that Internet company executives someday will be a prime source of campaign funding. Neither party, therefore, wants to offend the industry with overbearing laws. (How can we clamp down on those plucky little Net companies? They're so cute and smart, and they have so much potential.) Ever the dysfunctional parent, Washington fears a repeat of the mistakes it made with more mature industries like telecommunications and oil.

All the while, privacy-violating e-commerce companies grow fat, bratty and brazen. Any day now, Sen. John McCain (R-AZ) will wave the lash at Silicon Valley. He plans to introduce an Internet privacy bill of some kind. McCain's proposal will sit atop the pile of more than 300 privacy-related proposals now pending in Congress.

All of these measures are likely to languish because many lawmakers -- Democrat and Republican -- still prefer to give the industry more time to regulate itself. The White House is no less forgiving. When the Federal Trade Commission recently asked Congress for the power to regulate online privacy, President Clinton's policy team refused to endorse the plan.

Rumblings outside Washington

Another hindrance to new laws: Policymakers are too focused on debating technical aspects of privacy protection. They claim that the Internet's quicksilver qualities -- rapid growth and ever-changing technologies -- make the digital realm difficult to grasp and hard to regulate. But lawmakers should ignore the technologies involved and set rules that govern how companies use consumer data.

In the meantime, the Net industry's sweetly buttered good fortune is slowly fading among those outside Washington. Encouraged by recent settlements against the tobacco industry and a victory against Microsoft Corp., members of the National Association of Attorneys General are considering several large lawsuits against companies that secretly share or sell consumer information.

Perhaps these new threats will prompt the Internet industry to start following the codes of basic human courtesy. After all, secretly tagging Web users and tracking their movements like whales on the Discovery Channel is no way to build trust with customers.

In many cases, businesses might get what they want if they gave consumers a chance to volunteer for marketing lists. A surprising survey commissioned by the nonprofit research group Privacy in American Business discovered that only 11% of Americans claim to be "privacy fundamentalists," unwilling to part with their personal data.

Nearly 75% of respondents said they often trade their privacy for personal benefits, as long as the Web site has a privacy policy posted. And another 13% said they do not care about privacy at all. If businesses present consumers with frank explanations of how they plan to use gathered data, most consumers gladly will oblige.

Ask and ye shall receive

Indeed, consumers are sending mixed signals with regard to privacy. Everyday a new poll suggests heightening concern over the issue. But Americans are not -- and really never have been -- a particularly private people. (The fact that so many people answer a telephone pollster's questions about how private they are proves the point.)

Businessmen have "private" cell-phone conversations in the middle of busy airports. People offer up personal tidbits about themselves to perfect strangers in bars. Thousands of people vie to take part in network TV "reality shows" like "Survivor" and "Big Brother". Those who are not ready for prime time create Web sites that chronicle their comings and goings in streaming video. The New York Times even reported recently that voyeurism is on the upswing in Manhattan as more apartment dwellers forego Venetian blinds and heavy drapery to cloak their windows.

Oddly, no one considers these extreme forms of exhibitionism. Rather, they are cultural norms in a nation that delights in letting it all hang out. In the debate over online data collection, people often use the word "privacy" to explain what consumers want. But that is not accurate. Consumers want control over where and when they give out information.

The lesson should be clear for e-companies: Ask.